Love is Stronger than Pride

So this entry is centered around the affairs of the heart.

When I decided to start blogging I told myself I would NEVER write about relationship stuff. I get sooo annoyed with relationship reading, everyone has an opinion and everyone considers themselves the victim. No one has a clear understanding or solution. But unlike other relationship postings I want to address what I consider the core of our relationship dysfunctions.

This evening I spent time with one of my best friends at the gym. We always laugh, sweat, chat, and nearly pass out while doing our cardio routine. My friend and I share a lot of things in common, but one of our commonalities we wish we didn't share. We have both lost a parent suddenly. While we were working out this evening we shared memories and experiences. As always we spoke freely and open not concerned with being vulnerable or judged. On the ride home from the gym I began thinking about all of my relationships...

I wonder why can't we be vulnerable and open with all the people we love?

I believe that my friend I mentioned earlier and I have broken through that barrier through loss and the need for support and understanding and luckily it has carried over to all aspects of our friendship. But what will it take for me to share this type of mutual openness with all of the people I love?

I truly believe it's a matter of respect, trust, and being comfortable with just being you. Respect and trust explain themselves. But being comfortable with yourself I believe is vital is building any true relationship. A true relationship is one where you can be vulnerable and know that you're going to be heard, considered, and cared for. But when you don't understand, love, and respect the person that you are, how can someone else? When you're not ok with you, your time is spent trying to build a facade of what you think you should be. Even if you succeed at that, it's not the real you so you're not being vulnerable. It's hard to understand other people when you don't understand yourself.

So before we begin new romantic relationships, and while we're in current romantic relationships and friendships. Let's work on accepting ourselves for who we are. Just simply for who we are right now. Let's embrace our good qualities and recognize where we fall short. Because against popular belief it's ok to be imperfect. We will never be perfect. Let's truly discover who we are, what we desire, without thinking about what others expect from us.

I want to be able to say to my family, friends, boyfriend.....Here I am

IJL Dectective

Tracey the thief (l)


One thing that life experiences have taught me is, don't ever trust a woman who has lived in over 3 states that asks you on a daily basis to have lesbian sex with her!

This is true of a former co-worker of mine Tracey. I was introduced to Tracey along with Jodi as the two new girls who would be joining our staff and sharing an office with me. Of course I wasn't enthused about two new women to share space with nonetheless, I greeted the newbies with open arms. Jodi and I immediately hit it off and began to develop a friendship. We would often go to lunch with Tracey and Celeste another co-worker who we shared an office with.

Things were going great between all of us in the office until Tracey started to display some questionable behavior. It started with countless references to past drug use and homosexual "jokes". Jodi and I started to distance ourselves from Tracey because we were sure she couldn't be trusted! Celeste who is closer in age with Tracey and wants to truly believe everyone is good decided to befriend her.

One morning as we're matching our clients and talking about the weekend over coffee. Celeste blurts out " You'll never guess what happened, my credit card has been stolen!!" She also mentioned that Tracey had visited her over the weekend and gotten sick and had to rush home. I immediately think Tracey stole her card, but Celeste was convinced it was her roommate who she didn't trust and had some issues with. Knowing that Celeste and Tracey were friends I never mentioned my suspicion of Tracey and let that go.

Things were getting more tense at work with Tracey, not only did I find her untrustworthy and obnoxious, she began causing trouble for me in the office. So at this point I was completely fed up. I was also concerned that she was currently on some type of narcotic but decided to let it be, knowing that she would reveal who she really was eventually.

Eventually came sooner than I thought. About a week later one of our managers Jenna comes out of her office saying "You guys guess what, my credit card was stolen! Luckily my company caught it they just called me!" All of the girls were present myself, Jodi, Celeste, and Tracey. So I say "Wait a minute your card was stolen, and Celeste you car was stolen a few weeks ago? This is more than a coincidence, I'm leaving my purse in the car from now on. Actually, let me check my purse now!" Luckily all of my cards were present. I immediately pick up my cell phone to text Jodi which we often do:

Me: I think Tracey stole Celeste and Jenna's card.
Jodi: Haha. really?
Me:We should call electric beach (a place Jenna's card was used) and ask what the girl looked like. Tracey was gone a lot yesterday.
Jodi: I really think it was Tracey
Me: Me too! Like without a doubt
Jodi: Me too!

With Jodi and I on the same page we developed a plan to find out the truth. We decided to visit the tanning salon where Tracey attempted to buy a gift certificate. Jodi had a great idea to print off a picture of Tracey from facebook at Fedex kinko's to show at the salon. We planned to do all of this on our lunch break and come back with the proof to show Jenna. The salon owner didn't hesitate at identifying Tracey as the woman who was there a few days earlier.

With knots in our stomachs we rushed back to the office to meet with Jenna and tell her what we discovered. Hoping she would believe us and not think this was a personal vendetta against Tracey.

Fortunately Jenna listened patiently and appreciated that we went to suck lengths to find the culprit. She did not hesitate to contact the authorities and Tracey was arrested later that day by the Raleigh PD!!

I was pleased to actually see justice served and be apart of the process! I guess Miss Tracey will think twice before stealing from a Co-worker and a friend!!!
All in a days work! Never know what will happen at IJL, dating for busy professionals, and investigating hardened criminals!!!

My first blog! Yay I think this is going to be fun!